Neighbors Who Got Sweet Revenge Against Their Next Door Nightmares


Neighbors Who Got Sweet Revenge Against Their Next Door Nightmares


2Y6YYZKGU3BGZTLSA2XUGB5PUYE.jpg.optimal

Having a bad neighbor can completely ruin your standard of living. Not only do you have to worry about your own problems in life, but you’re also saddled with the expectations and actions of a person who is seemingly out to get you at all times.

But sometimes, it’s possible to get revenge against these people without getting law enforcement, or your landlord, involved. And thankfully, the people who have successfully gotten revenge against their bad neighbors were willing to share their stories.

Road Block


resizezoltan-tasi-QxjEi8Fs9Hg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My house is right on the corner of an area where the road turns into a T, and I had issues with people cutting the corner and driving through my yard. One time, someone even nearly hit my dog.

So I bought a boulder that was probably 300 or 400 pounds and put it right on the corner. That winter, we had a bad snowstorm.

Someone was coming through in a lifted Dodge and he hit the boulder going about 20 mph. He totaled the truck. Since then, I’ve had zero issues with people.

Prestigious-Yoghurt3

Simple Payback


resizelucas-alexander-r5jL69trU-s-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I was in middle school, our upstairs neighbor made a ton of noise every night around 9 pm. She’d be moving furniture, arguing with her partner at top volume, slamming doors, etc.

So my mom always had me practice my tuba under her bedroom before school in the morning. A simple payback.

thejrush13

It's Not a Crime to Talk


resizetzvi-kilov-R_q_zbrPCyw-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Our neighbor was a pain in the butt. He would call the authorities on us even if we were just standing in our yard, minding our own business.

He didn’t have a mental problem; he was just a jerk who thought calling 9-1-1 would scare us. We would hear him on the phone saying, “They’re standing in their yard, talking again.”

The officers would often apologize for coming by, explaining that they had no choice but to respond to the complaints. Sometimes, they would just drive by and wave to us while shaking their heads. 

So one night, we had enough. We bought a thousand-count string of firecrackers, made a makeshift fuse, put it in his garage, and waited. Needless to say, it was super lit.

gambler328

Barren Wasteland


resizejason-tuinstra-4OfaTz6SdYs-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I poured salt all over my neighbor’s lawn after his kids threw bricks at my dogs. The best part is, he owned one of the largest lawn care companies in my hometown.

He lost a tremendous amount of business after his prize-winning lawn turned into a barren wasteland.

HernandezFam2020

Advertisement

Let Karma Do Its Thing


resizealexander-london-mJaD10XeD7w-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Our neighbor hit our car and when we tried to work it out with her, she threatened to kill our cat. We set up cameras at our house and decided to let karma run its course.

Sure enough, a few months later, her husband filed for a divorce and she began stalking him. She ended up getting apprehended by the authorities three times due to her unruly behavior.

Every time she had a tantrum, it happened in full glory right in front of our house, so we caught it all on camera. We’d set up chairs with snacks to enjoy the show of her getting placed in the wagon.

Sahellio

Save the Bees


resizeannie-spratt-7SXNxz8UIw4-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I deliberately don’t mow my front lawn because it’s seeded with lots of native wildflowers, which makes it a magnet for bees, butterflies, hoverflies, etc.

My neighbor complained about it, saying he thought it didn’t fit in with the other manicured lawns and green spaces of the area. Fair enough. But rather than give in to his demands and mow my lawn, I wrote to the local council and suggested a “help the pollinators” wildflower initiative.

The local council doesn’t mow the verges anymore in summer (about half the neighbors don’t either), so all of them resemble my mini “unsightly” wildflower meadow rather than the neighbor’s chemical patch of a lawn. It drives him mad every summer without fail.

Stormaen

Girl Scout Cookies


resizedarren-halstead-UtXj8dVs2tU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I just moved into my new apartment in Chicago and was woken up at 3 AM to some loud knocking on my door. Given it’s Chicago, I thought the worst and assumed someone with a loaded gun was on the other side of that door.

A moment passes and I sit silently in my bed running through self-defence scenarios in my head. I then hear a woman yell something through my door, and it had me on a tilt. This lady says, “This is your neighbor, I was just wondering if you’d like to buy some girl scout cookies.”

Naturally, I ignored her offer and proceeded to go back to sleep angry and confused. Either my neighbor was high or trying to rob me.

Norezu

Caught You!


resizerashid-khreiss-uxDQRHi4vfo-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

He was really nosey and for some reason he hated me. I was a 14-year-old girl and I don’t remember doing anything to this man, but he would always rat me out to my parents if he saw me outside.

He told them I was smoking, having sex in the tree in the front lawn, dealing, hurting animals… he just made things up! If I were in my backyard, he would watch me through our privacy fence.

Once I was out back drinking a root beer (one of those in a glass bottle). He popped up from behind the fence with this huge smirk on his face said, “CAUGHT YOU!” and tattled on me for drinking underage.

My dad found out and was absolutely livid. He brought him out back and showed him it was a root beer and then explained to him that if he ever caught him looking through our fence again, he would call the police.

HaphazardSquirrels

Taking Liberties


resizemarkus-spiske-vCCeCZGcfSY-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My significant other and I rented the middle unit of a one-story, three-unit triplex. A sidewalk led directly up to our front door, and on either side of the sidewalk, slightly to the left and right of our front door, were two very small garden areas fashioned out of landscape timbers.

For the first six months of living there, nothing was planted in them, so we decided to buy and plant some flowers to brighten it up. The next day, we found a shocking handwritten letter on our door. 

Our left-side neighbor informed us that he was deeply offended that we had taken the liberty to plant flowers in HIS garden. As he explained, it was the 2 x 2 garden on his side of the sidewalk.

He intended to plant a tomato plant there and he planned to follow through with his plans whether there were flowers or not. In a letter of our own, we explained that a tomato plant was not the intended use of a flower garden and that planting a tomato directly in front of our door would be inappropriate.

The next day, we came home to find our flowers dug up and placed in front of our door, and a tomato plant complete with a metal cage planted in its place.

LikeChicken

I Never Noticed That Before


resizeanna-dudkova-bNXn0gKd454-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I live outside the city limits on a wooded acreage. A year ago, I took one of my dogs out at 10 pm for her last pee before bed. I noticed a light on my neighbor’s property on the other side of his pond, close to the edge of the woods. ‘That’s odd,’ I thought. ‘I’ve never noticed that before.’

After looking at it for a minute, I realized it was fire. I called him and told him there was a fire in his woods. He blew me off and told me, “Oh I was just burning some leaves today.” He was totally unconcerned. I called him a moron, hung up, and called the fire department.

They came out and he was all apologetic to them. He said he didn’t know it had still been burning. It’s really his parent’s place. He moved in after his father died. We lived next to his parents for 35 years and never a cross word. Lovely people. He’s not.

[deleted]

Advertisement

They Caused a Massive Leak


resizejames-lee-R9rFKy_AVbw-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

A few years back, my dumb neighbor bought his little kid (maybe four-years-old) one of those hard plastic pools to swim in. This is in an apartment building. They lived above me. 

Long story short it breaks, water everywhere, leaks down through my ceiling all over my couch and coffee table, etc. Then he proceeds to say it’s not his problem. My landlord screwed him up financially, and his family was kicked out of the building for being idiots.

plagues138

That's My Spot


resizejohn-matychuk-yvfp5YHWGsc-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

He parked in my spot while I was out during vacation. That’s fine, I wasn’t there, whatever right? But when I got back he continued parking there, looks at me as I’m pulling in after an 18-hour trip and three airplane rides and questions if I want to park AT MY SPOT.

This wasn’t a rhetorical question, he was literally upset that I wanted to park there.

mortryn

Watching the Clock


resizeoladimeji-ajegbile-URkqBy5EuPg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

He would log the times I would get home from work (I work late and get home around 1-2 am). He confronted me one night about driving too fast down the road. Fair enough, speeding is wrong, but it was 1:30 am, and he’s watching his neighbor’s movements.

ColeAppreciation

It Only Went Downhill From There


resizecharles-deluvio-dtK56Vx3ajk-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

They would put their garbage cans in front of my driveway because they were not paying for garbage pickup and (somehow) thought his would be picked up in addition to mine by being in front of my house.

I was mostly mad that I had to see their ugly garbage cans in front of my house (along with cleanup the inevitable garbage that would fall out on the ground).

Call the garbage company, mentioned what I could do. They knew about it, and immediately marked their records, and sent someone out to put the street number on the bins. From there it only went downhill.

PabloXPicasso

We Caught Her on Our Security Cameras


resizehannah-lim-U6nlG0Y5sfs-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

First, she started complaining about our dogs and how they’re upsetting everyone in the neighborhood but they hardly ever bark. So we went around to all the neighbors and asked them and no one knew what she was talking about.

We even caught her on our cameras sticking her hand through our fence to provoke the dogs to bark so she could record it. Eventually, we explained to the municipality that she’s bonkers and they don’t take her dog complaints too seriously anymore.

about_34_ninjas

Every Time it Rains


resizedillon-kydd-3Ignkeds3w8-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When we moved in we had two concrete runners for a driveway and it was really muddy. It wasn’t on my parents “to do” list to get a full driveway when the house needed new windows, siding, and a roof. When my dad would back out in bad weather he’d drag mud into the road.

Well, this was apparently a personal attack on the neighbor’s white driveway, which he power washed at least once a week. So he called the county on us every time it rained, but they didn’t do anything. Then one day my mom was carrying in paint and the neighbor charged at her!

He wanted to spill the paint on her car. My momma isn’t a witch, so she charged him back. He called the cops, who just showed up, chatted to my mom, and left.

Muhryzzle

Advertisement

Trying to Steal Land


resizeaubrey-odom-uV-dSJ98q_U-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I was a kid, our next door neighbor decided to sell his house. One day, my father found him outside marking the property boundaries for a fence but he was way off the line.

After a bit of a heated discussion, that neighbor, my father, and another neighbor with abutting land agreed to hired a professional to mark them.

The surveyor marked the line about twenty feet into the neighbor’s land on all sides and just over a hundred feet in the back wooded areas.

Turns out he was trying to steal land from all the neighbors by slowly expanding his yard; the fence was an attempt to make it permanent for a sale.

Data-Minor

They Block the Street


resizebady-abbas-hB9WzC8GYeU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

They felt it was appropriate to block the street so that their kids could play, and they constantly harassed my wife for driving 20 mph when residential areas are 30 mph. It came to a head when they decided to step in front of her car. I went over to “discuss” things with them.

After enduring the screaming, cursing, and threats of bodily harm, I told them to call the cops. That didn’t go over well. So I called the cops on them. They were told to stop and that the street is no place for young children to play. They kept it up, so I took it up with code enforcement.

It turns out that illegally blocking a public street without a permit is really expensive.

dreamscapesaga

He Poisoned the Pond and Denied It


resizejohnny-briggs-7CdNNvijw9E-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

The neighbors don’t like the pond that my parents have in the backyard. Frogs live in and around the pond and they make noise, particularly at night. The neighbor’s house is quite close and he has crazy thin walls. But it’s not my parents’ fault if the guy didn’t insulate his walls.

One day, the neighbor had had enough of the frogs, so he poured detergent into the pond — which is not only full of fish and frogs, but also where all the neighborhood cats go to drink. He gloated about it to another neighbor.

My parents confronted him about it; at first, he denied it and invited my dad to meet him in front of his house to fight it out. Then he came back all sorry, saying he had a hard job (we all do, dude) and that he loves the pond and that the frogs are lovely and that he wouldn’t do such a thing.

My parents didn’t believe him and told him that next time they’ll call the cops and an environmental NGO.

glouns

I Simply Told Her No


resizeclaudio-poggio-AnK894h_heA-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I started snow blowing at 8:30 one night when I got home because I couldn’t get in the driveway. The neighbor leaned out her window screaming that she was trying to sleep.

She also wanted me not to snow blow onto the four-foot section of lawn next to my driveway because then she couldn’t access her A/C unit in the middle of winter.

There was nowhere else to put the snow, so I simply told her no. She freaked, so I just stopped clearing her sidewalk, which I used to do to be nice.

rage675

She Impersonated My Mother


resizejon-moore-0MKzwPmehRE-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Our neighbor called the utility company to mark up our yard for no reason other than to be petty. She called them acting as my mother and said not to call and confirm the appointment or ring the doorbell when they showed to mark up our property as we have a newborn that will be sleeping.

The thing is the “newborn” was my 8-year-old brother. The utility company called, apologizing profusely for bother us, but they had to tell us they would not make it today. Well, they record all phone calls so they provided us the appointment call and we could tell immediately it was our neighbor.

We called the cops who gave her a talking to. After listening to the tape, he could tell she was lying, but there was nothing we could do as no vandalism occurred on our property and service was not provided.

DJConwayTwitty

An Attempt on My Dogs' Lives


resizelikemeat-3sgNkN4wRWI-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Neighbor threw a “bark reduction” machine into the backyard because my dogs were a little noisy. And when that didn’t work, he threw pieces of hamburger with blueish pills inside of them over the wall.

I thank god that I was swimming in the pool when I saw the meat flying over the wall or else my dogs would have died. Jerk was arrested and charged. He no longer lives behind my parent’s house anymore.

DaemonDrayke

Advertisement

Not a Cat Person


resizeplanetcare-5cpBWEl6y6c-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My neighbor and I share an outdoor laundry room. A couple of feral kittens were trapped on our property and we mutually agreed they could stay in the laundry room. Though they were initially pretty feral and aggressive, I tamed them to the point where they were cuddly babies.

However, they never really liked my neighbor (she was really grabby and didn’t let them warm up to her, she just tried to touch them and it freaked them out).

One day, I came home and the cats were gone. Apparently, my favorite of the two had bitten her in response to her grabbiness and she had them put down.

fyresflite

A Baby Shouldn't Cry that Much!


resizeomar-lopez-vTknj2OxDVg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

The old lady in the condo below us called CPS because, in her words, “I’m a retired nurse and I KNOW a baby shouldn’t cry that much.” First of all, I had newborn twins.

So she wasn’t hearing one baby cry, she was hearing two babies cry. Second of all, one of my twins was colicky, so from around 5:30 pm to 8:30 pm there was basically nothing I could do to get him to stop crying.

Third of all, how about knocking on the door and seeing if everything is okay or offering to help before calling CPS? 

The investigation was open and shut because it was obvious our kids weren’t being neglected or abused in any way, but it added a whole new level of stress to an already crazy-stressful situation.

thisisgettingstupid_

I'm Within My Rights


resizerandy-fath-07dDz_PI05k-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Our neighbor complained that we fixed something on their fence. I said I thought it was my fence because that’s what’s on the deeds and plot plan. (This was a brand new development.) They insisted on an investigation and I said, “Hold on, let’s discuss it.

Even if it turns out to be my fence, I’ll move things so you can’t see anything.” Nope. They complained to the developers.

Turns out the developers had gifted them a strip of land when they built our house, but their sense of entitlement led them to believe that the brand new fence on my brand new plot was theirs too. 

The developer contacted me telling me I’m in breach of contract because they’re scared of the neighbors who’ve commissioned before and sent a letter with the contract text to prove it.

Only they sent only the first half of the paragraph. I sent back the full paragraph which fully explains how I’m perfectly within my rights. SoForAllYourDarkGods

A Bad Influence


resizemarius-ciocirlan-T9pdHqCsyoQ-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My neighbor attempted to sue me for letting all the neighborhood kids carve pumpkins with my kids. We bought a lot of pumpkins and plastic carvers and the neighbor’s kids came over too.

When they took their pumpkins home, their parents called the police and filed a report saying we were trying to influence their kids with Satan. ob12_99

I Don't Need Their Permission


resizemarkus-spiske-_b9mXKt0fc4-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I was clearing out some trees in the woods next to my house. This lady stopped and asked, all snotty and arrogant, “Did you ask your neighbors if you could do that?” I replied, “When my neighbors start paying my mortgage I’ll get their permission.”

It should be noted that many people stopped and complimented how cleaned-up and nice it looked.

[deleted]

Come Here, Kitty Kitty


resizeayelt-van-veen-hbiOGtAspCY-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

The neighbors have two outside cats. They wander in our garden all the time. One day the neighbor lady comes stomping over, her grumpy husband glaring at us over the fence between our yards.

She proceeds to yell at me for putting something on her cat. She points to the cat’s tummy, which is covered in pink and blue and yellow streaks.

To her, this is proof I’m poisoning her cat. I point out my young daughter’s sidewalk chalk all over the patio and explain that the cat keeps coming over and rolling all over her drawings. The lady looks at the chalk, looks at the cat, looks at me, and then stomps away.

mumfywest

A Room With a View


resizesimon-alibert-JIg5GJlGN5Q-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I was a kid, my next door neighbor sued the guy across from him because his tree got tall enough that it blocked the sun for an additional 15 minutes each morning from when he had purchased the house 20 years prior.

He was about 80 years old and his argument was that in another 20 years it will likely be 30 minutes. He died less than a year after his case was thrown out.

righthanddan

Stay in Your Spot


resizeclem-onojeghuo-qfKWDtwo_Fc-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When we are parked on the street normally with her car either in front of us or behind us, she would move her car as much as possible away and get the other car’s owner (in front or behind us) to move away as well,

So it looked like we took two spots… then she would complain that we were always taking two spots.

CaptainChrisNova

Taken Advantage Of


resizedaniel-watson-8vBpYpTGo90-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

He took advantage of the fact that my grandmother (whom I now live with as her caretaker),

Has dementia and would send a rotation of the three people that live there over about three times a week to mow her lawn and cash out on her inability to remember previous payments.

raisedinyourhands

What's the Damage?


resizedorothea-oldani-kLGm1XMBn8k-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

He tore down part of my freaking fence under the guise of fixing two posts… but hasn’t gotten around to actually FIXING it for almost two months. The last conversation was me asking him to get estimates to have a fence company come in for the repair and him agreeing.

challam

It's an Emergency


resizebruno-martins-Q4UcaP7tR4s-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

He rang my doorbell at 4 am over and over and asked me to go with him because there was an emergency and it was important. I went with him. He led me over to new his car and started asking what I thought of it while looking very proud.

Aqueluna

No Kids Allowed


resizeleo-rivas-wtxcaDIdOCM-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

She called the cops on our then six-year-old son because he was playing outdoors on public property. It wasn’t a road or anything. There was no danger whatsoever.

He wasn’t screaming or anything either, she just didn’t like kids. She also told our three-year-old daughter that she was ugly.

azerty1976

Eviction Notice Served


resizebrian-yurasits-jVXgfjSDnJI-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

It started by letting her kids and animals run wild in my backyard. So, I dropped $5,000 on a six-foot privacy fence that my father-in-law and I built. Then she had her water turned off for lack of payment and began pooping in plastic bags and throwing them over my fence.

When confronted about it, she kindly denied it and then took to social media. I called the landlord and had an eviction notice served the next day.

Durania

Needed To Wash My Eyes After Seeing That


resizeistockphoto-649766120-612x612-1.jpg.optimal.jpgiStock

When I was 15, we had a neighbor that was just weird. Looking back, she most likely had some real mental issues, or maybe an addiction, or even both. She was noisy, belligerent, and she had really bad body odor - the kind you can smell a few feet away.

One time she went mental knocking at our front door, asking us to turn down the music (we were watching TV with our new sound system). I mean, she could have just asked nicely but she had to be a total witch about it.

Aside from her overall nastiness, she had this annoying habit of crossing part of our yard as a shortcut to her house. We put up a higher fence so she couldn’t cut through our yard anymore.

And that was the start of the nightmare: she went out with a kiddie snow shovel, got dog poop round the block, and threw it in our yard. 

That was it! We wanted to catch her red handed so we could deal with her legally. We set up a camera to catch her in the act next time. We set it right on the path she always takes through our yard. But what we saw in the video gave us goosebumps, NOT what we expected. 

She actually squatted, and took a dump! Then she stamped her feet  on her dump to hide it I guess? It was gross and weird. Even the cops we called said they’ve never seen anything like this.

But thankfully, we were able to report her because of that video. I think she got a restraining order. Even to this day, that video kind of haunts me and makes me cringe when I remember it.

Permalink

Sorry, I Forgot to Praise You


resizejonas-jaeken-1TmI9BTLmiU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My neighbor rang one day to be nosy and check why my husband’s car was home on a workday. I politely thanked him for his call and let him know my husband was sleeping and had a cold, nothing to worry about. 

Apparently, I was meant to praise him profusely for being such a caring neighbor, and my husband was meant to follow up with a call once he was awake and also lavish him with praise for caring.

Because we didn’t, we got to hear about it loudly every afternoon until we moved several months later.

macadamiaicecream

Stealing From Your Own Garage


resizeerik-mclean-RV_WdgB1zFg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Yelled at me for entering a shared garage to get some of our stuff. He later claimed I was after his gun, which was stored in a gun locker with a lock which only he had the key for. He was in his 60’s or 70’s at the time.

Sharkey_B

Watch Your Dog


resizethe-blowup-t06aN6vewaQ-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

His dog went through our trash and got sick. Dog ended up needing to go to the vet and told me when he bumped into me at my old job. “Yeah, it was like $5,000 to get her back to health. You’re lucky I don’t bill you guys.”

Mind you this guy let his dog go through everyone’s yard and poop wherever it wanted; it’s not like the dog escaped, he just willingly didn’t care.

The_Axem_Ranger

Green Thumb


resizemarkus-spiske-vrbZVyX2k4I-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

This neighbor guy ripped up and threw away my mum’s sweet pea plant that she got from her friend who died of cancer.

When she complained, he started ranting about how our garden is a disgrace and an embarrassment to the neighborhood and we need to replace all the grass and plants with concrete.

annoyednerd2

A Great Taste in Music


resizejosh-sorenson-u8-QI4tRES0-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My upstairs neighbor was trying to force me to move out. So she put her speakers on her floor pointing straight down and blared them at full volume. The instant it started, I leaped up in outrage at her audacity, but after a few seconds I realized I really, really like this song.

So I give it one song and as it’s winding down I prepare my outrage once again, only to be choked off when the next song is also a perennial favorite. I didn’t even bother getting upset before realizing that I liked the third song, too.

She stopped at midnight when she was legally required to, and apparently realized she wasn’t getting much “bang” for her buck as far as irritating me, so she didn’t try it anymore.

Oudeis16

Laundry Makes Me Cranky


resizerunnyrem-LfqmND-hym8-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My upstairs neighbor — long story short — got super heated about how I didn’t see him in the hallway and say hi once and then blamed his outburst on the fact that laundry makes him cranky.

After having a couple dozen drinks, he tried to get into my apartment last Wednesday afternoon, and then asked if I had a problem with him.

When I explained that his behavior makes me uneasy, he called me passive aggressive and then said EVERYONE forgets where they live sometimes, and he’d forgotten where his apartment was because he was humming as he walked up the stairs.

clocksailor

Slowing Down Traffic


resizechris-stenger-X39laJoFx4Q-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I moved onto a dirt road with several houses on it. My friend has lived down the road his whole life. The people next to my house only come up for the summer and are never there in the winter.

When summer comes, however, there are always multiple potholes on the road in front of their house. Curious, I asked my friend why. He said the neighbors come up in the summer and dig the holes themselves in order to ‘slow down’ traffic.

emf3rd31495

Foot Enthusiast


resizejakob-owens-WzncgWs3RJ4-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My across the hall apartment neighbor is married has two kids and he is so weird. Like just overall off putting. Anyways, I leave my sandals out next to my door (no shoes in the house) every night.

It so happens one night I had to meet my best friend who came over in the dead of night at the front since she doesn’t know my place very well.

As I open the door I catch him caressing and smelling my sandals. I freeze and just mildly freak.

He saw me staring, did a weird giggle, said something about his kids calling him and then he yanked me into this weird side hug. Now I leave my shoes in a box inside my house. Ugh.

MsAtomicBomb97

It's Not the Dog's Fault


resizeartem-beliaikin-iYBY1qNwfZI-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My old neighbor used to walk his dog on a leash to poop in my yard. My mom had me throw it back in his yard once, he called the police and claimed he never did that. A few months later my family and I were going out of town and after we left our house, my mom had realized she had forgotten something.

We turned around only to find our neighbor standing in the middle of our yard with his dog on a leash dropping a nice dukey in our front yard. All I remember is my mom winding down her window and yelling “[Bleep] you Don!”

thewikemeston

The Ceiling Fan is Too Loud


resizejason-anderson-CN2h4eUbFGw-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

The woman who lived above our apartment was a psycho when it came to noise. I’m talking just regular, run-of-the-mill, everyday noise. My partner and I are very quiet.

This woman could not stand the ceiling fan in our apartment. She said she heard it over her TV at all hours (even though we only ran it in the afternoon when we were in our living room).

Our landlords said she was a nuisance for years about the ceiling fan. They had technicians come in several times and they all said there was no real sound coming off it.

Yet, the woman would be so upset over it that she’d throw tantrums, stomping her feet back and forth across her unit whenever it was on. We had no AC, so it was really our only source of air circulation when we used it.

The day we moved out, we knew the apartment wouldn’t be accessed for two weeks. We cranked that ceiling fan up to 11, closed the door, locked it, then dropped the key in the mail back to the landlord who was five states away.

Nightswimm

Obligated Response


resizejon-tyson-TlD4UoFTZ24-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I have an old neighbor who represents maybe one of five white households in a mixed minority neighborhood. He likes to call code enforcement on everyone for every little thing.

He did it once when my trash can lid didn’t close completely. It’s gotten to a point where the code enforcement guy just texts me directly because he’s obligated to respond to every complaint.

I get someone to do a massive trim of my three pecan trees every other spring. This past fall, after an incident in which he contacted the city over my just expired registration, I got a knock on my door from the power company.

They were present “on behalf” of my neighbor. They had recently fixed the street lamp dividing our front property which had been out for two years, and a singular large pecan tree branch was preventing light from shining on his driveway.

They couldn’t do anything to force me to trim the branch, but they were still requesting I do so on behalf of my neighbor. So naturally, this year, when it was time to trim my pecan trees, can you guess which branch didn’t get cut?

EvilPilotFish

Help Yourself


resizedavor-denkovski-qt_TCQxFrw-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I moved to a small rural town where everyone knows everyone. The townspeople love to inject the “will of the Lord” into everything. It’s quite annoying. I was just some random guy nobody knew.

Last year was my first time having a garden and I was so proud of my tomatoes, peppers, and cucumbers. I told a trusted neighbor to help herself to some of my crops.

When the time came to pick a bunch of tomatoes and peppers, I went to the garden and found it absolutely picked clean from the day before. Knowing that the frail old lady didn’t do this, I set up cameras in the garden to catch the thieves in the act.

Over the course of a week, I caught four different fully-grown adults on camera snooping and taking from my garden.

I did some research and found out that all but one of them worked full-time and they were in no need of food or financial assistance. I left the needy family out of this.

I went to the community Facebook page with 5,000 members and posted pictures of them stealing from my garden with the caption: “God blessed me with this beautiful bounty and I’m so thankful he led the less fortunate and hungry to my garden to nourish their HONEST souls.”

I sat back, and watched the notifications and hate comments fly. Never again has a tomato been picked without someone asking.

FormerStuff

In His Grill


resizejulian-hochgesang-xAtPFINNagQ-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

The street I grew up on was paved to a certain point, and the rest was a dirt road that ran up through a farm. A family lived in a trailer on that dirt road and their son, Gary, would FLY down the road in his ’84 Lincoln.

We, as kids, were always riding bikes or playing hockey in the street, and pretty much every parent had complained about Gary to his parents.

They didn’t care. We had county leaf pick-up, so we could blow all our leaves into a pile near the street and a truck would come by and suck them all up.

This was Gary’s favorite time of the year as he would drive his car through the leaves with multiple passes to hit both sides of the street. My neighbor across the street was fed up with him and decided to act.

He put cinder blocks in his leaf pile. It was 2 am and the neighborhood was awakened by a loud BOOM followed by people laughing on their front porches as Gary’s ’84 Lincoln had a cinder block through his grill.

hoots711

They All Sided With Me


resizeamerican-public-power-association-VuR4oHZ3ucc-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When the house next door was being built, the “new” owners told the builders to use my electricity to build their house. When I said heck no, they put a really big generator on the border of my house and placed boards along the side to force the noise in my direction.

Well after three days of that nonsense, they all went home for the weekend. I went out with my sprinklers from the front and back and I let them run over it until Sunday night. Needless to say, after they walked over to start it on Monday, it sank in about six inches.

They tried to tow it out with their truck but it sank too, and they had to call a heavy wrecker to pull themselves out as the truck sank to the doors.

They threatened to sue for damages but couldn’t prove anything and all the other neighbors sided with me.

pennypanic1

Floating Away


resizeclaire-jones-nKtTubtxf6g-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I live in a weekend lakefront community. My neighbor is just a weekender, but when he comes out, he acts as if we all work for him or something.

It’s like he thinks we owe him—he expects us to be completely silent and be essentially invisible to him. He hates dogs and physically hurts my puppies through the fence. Naturally, the dogs are terrified of him and bark as soon as they see him.

It drives him crazy and it simply makes things worse. I don’t let the dogs bark for long, but I refuse to keep them inside all weekend just for his sake. Anyway, the lake flooded a few years ago, and it presented the perfect opportunity to teach him a lesson.

I went around securing all my neighbors’ boats and kayaks—all but his stuff. I enjoyed watching his boat float away.

dowend

I Get to Choose the Color of My Fence


resizedaniel-chekalov-A8rbSO0s9YY-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I decided to fence in my backyard and I asked my neighbor if he would pay for half of it since it also ran along his property line. He declined. So I installed a fence around my backyard a few inches on my side of the property line.

My neighbor then tied a new fence into my fence, as well as to our other neighbor’s fence on the other side. So he only paid for about 40 feet of fence altogether and he managed to get his entire yard fenced in. Jerk move!

But it wasn’t a big deal, even though he got a few extra square feet of backyard space and a free fence on two sides for free. Sometime later, his dog knocked a hole in my fence. He asked me to fix it since his dog could escape.

I declined. I told him to fix it since it was my fence and his dog did the damage. He called code enforcement and the homeowners association. It turned out that if I have a fence, I have to keep it in good repair. 

I was out of luck—but I knew how to get my revenge. I repaired the fence and then painted the side of my fence that faced his property high liner yellow, blue, green, mixed with slates of black and brown.

According to the bylaws, I get to choose the color of my fence as long as it is in good repair. He complained about it to the HOA but they told him they couldn’t do anything.

Eventually, he caved and painted over my fence. I had him charged with vandalism and he was fined. He also had to repaint my fence with the original terrible colors.

But he didn’t stop there—he then bulk emailed the entire subdivision, asking them to support him in his attempt to get me to paint my fence. Instead, the neighbor to his other side and behind him all painted their fences to match mine. He moved a few months later.

CaptainFlyingsolo

Revenge is a Dish Best Served Cold


resizedev-benjamin-pwr2uTPpz68-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

On my last day in my old apartment, I went #1 on a plate and stuck it in the freezer. Then, I waited until it froze, detached the frozen disc from the plate, and slid it under his front door so that it would eventually melt on his carpet.

Thanks to three years of loud music at 3 am every night, neighbor.

AussieJimboLives

That's Not How You Ask For a Favor


resizeivana-cajina-WPVtT0MEM00-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My neighbor had a bad habit of parking too many cars in our really small parking lot. There were only enough spots for two cars per apartment, and there were four apartments total. They often had three to five cars parked at any given time.

I always had to ask them to vacate our parking spots when we got home. Every day practically. The neighbor on the other side of me got their Pontiac stuck in the driveway because of the snow.

They left it there overnight and the next morning when everyone needed to leave for work and whatnot, it was right in the middle of the driveway. Everybody started yelling at me because I guess they both expected me to fix the situation with my truck.

I told my boyfriend at the time that we were NOT to help either of them. They both went to HIM and asked if my truck could be used to get the car out. My truck. No.

I dug out enough of the snowbank to get myself out and let them deal with the rest. Both of the neighbors got in my face, so at that point, I definitely wasn’t lending them my truck.

ZombieBunnzoli85

Dead Silence for Two Weeks


resizejosh-sorenson-u8-QI4tRES0-unsplash-1.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I have some upstairs neighbors that are obnoxious. Their subwoofer quakes to action movies around midnight. They also have LOUD, bed-breaking intimacy.

But the worst thing they do is tan leather in their apartment, which means there is hammering and dragging around of equipment at all hours of the night. Sometimes, I blast my stereo for 30 seconds and they quiet down.

One weekend, I had my kids over and the neighbors were being super loud. Things were being dropped on the floor and people were rolling around. It was like they were wrestling with all the yelling and laughing.

I remembered seeing a Bluetooth speaker show up on my devices list when they moved it. It wasn’t secured with a PIN, so anyone could join it. I instantly had an idea—it was evil, but it had to be done.

I waited until the kids were gone and at around 10 pm I connected to their speaker. Then. I found a creepy ASMR video on YouTube where a guy role-plays as a slayer and describes what he will be doing to his victim in detail.

I turned it to max volume, then after a few minutes, I turned it off. I heard frantic running around all over the place with doors opening and slamming.

I couldn’t stop chuckling. Dead silence for two glorious weeks.

REHTONA_YRT

Where'd the Blonde Go?


resizestella-de-smit-nCxCBnK6UKQ-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

We did this at our last rental house. The neighbors were constantly fighting and we’d hear it through the walls since we lived in a semi-detached property. They would also get tipsy every weekend and blast loud music until 4 am.

Well, one time, the girlfriend went out of town for a week for some work training thing and while she was gone, we saw another girl park outside the house. We also heard the boyfriend and the new girl going at it very loudly.

At their next party, my partner and I both went over to ask them to turn the music down. The boyfriend opened the door and started shouting that we should mind our own business. Then, the girlfriend appeared behind him and said the same. 

That’s when my wife casually asked the most devastating question: “Oh, did you get back together? What about that nice blonde girl who was here all last week?”

Then we just went home and enjoyed listening to them throwing everyone out and having their last fight.

Wind_Yer_Neck_In

Ringing Off the Hook


resizepawel-czerwinski-0xCCPIbl3M-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Years ago, when you could advertise house sales in the paper without too many pictures, my brother put in an ad for his obnoxious neighbor’s house. He priced it at about $75K under market value as a private sale with the neighbor’s phone number.

He found out the guy was inundated with calls for weeks.

hank-_-the-_-tank

A Perfect Time to Garden


resizemarkus-spiske-71uUjIt3cIs-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My previous neighbor was the biggest jerk I’d ever lived next to. I got passive revenge one day by deciding to fertilize my yard with that stinky fishy liquid formula when I noticed he was having all his mates over for a barbecue.

Chromattix

Everyone's Cameras Stopped Working that Day


resizewassim-chouak-kJCAKWTH6u4-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My friend John had a neighbor named David who would siphon gas out of everyone’s vehicles. Nearly all of John’s neighbors had cameras, so they knew who it was, but couldn’t get the guy to stop.

John went to the store to purchase a locking gas cap and while he was there, he had a bit of a light bulb moment. He decided to buy one for David’s car instead. John waited until David was asleep that night to hatch his plan.

At around 9 pm, he installed the locking gas cap on David’s car. Apparently, David flipped out and went door-to-door asking all of the neighbors he knew had cameras to tell him who did it.

Miraculously, everyone’s camera failed to work that day. John said the car sat up for about a week before David was able to remove it. After realizing how much his neighbors hated him, David decided to move.

Justso_Tiny_756

What You Can't See Can't Hurt You


resizealex-suprun-A53o1drQS2k-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

In college, our neighbor kept trying to get us evicted because we had too many cars. She also installed cameras to spy on our house. She called a noise complaint on us one day while we were playing basketball in our driveway and my roommate told her to kiss his butt.

He then mooned her and she did not like that one bit. She proceeded to call 9-1-1, saying he had been indecent in front of her kid.

The officers who arrived watched the tapes over. Seeing as we did nothing wrong (and my friend only mooned her as a joke), they just told us to ignore her.

We ended up hanging a giant sheet of plastic 20 feet up in the trees along the entire property line so they couldn’t see us. It looked trashy as heck, but it actually brought us peace until our lease ended. Unfortunately, we weren’t allowed to renew.

Next-Count-7621

Patience is Key


resozeoli-woodman-nUL_PP69IPA-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I had a girl at my old apartment complex open the washer with my clothes inside, take them out, and put them on the folding table. She did this right in front of me as I was removing my second load into the dryer.

I asked what she was doing and she was like, “These have been in here for like 20 minutes,” and I was like, “No, they haven’t.”

I used the laundry app and it said it had just finished washing two minutes prior. I was literally about to put them in the dryer, so I told her, “Please don’t touch my clothes like that.”

She just let out a rude scoff. I went back 45 minutes later to take my clothes out of the dryer and she was in there doing the same thing AGAIN with someone else’s load. She was taking their damp clothes out to put her own load in.

I knew for a fact the clothes were just done because the cycle only goes for 45 minutes. So I decided to teach her a lesson. I threw my half-eaten banana in with her wash.

samcahnruns

Just Deal With It


resizelee-campbell-GI6L2pkiZgQ-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

In college, the guy in the dorm room next to mine was apparently a bit insane. He would bang on our shared wall whenever he heard any noise. The first time he did it, I was just talking to a friend in my room at normal volume in the middle of the day.

It kept going like this for months. He once banged on our wall for like five minutes because I sneezed. One day we noticed that he had a large pair of panties and a pair of earplugs taped to his door.

There was a note that read: “Put on your big-girl panties and deal with it.” Apparently, his neighbors on the other side were sick of him, too. So one weekend, I was leaving the dorm to visit home, and he started banging on the wall because I flushed a toilet.

That was the last straw. I ended up putting a Britney Spears song on repeat, with my speakers up against his wall, and I left for the weekend…being sure to lock all the doors behind me.

Luckboy28

Mental Torture


resizedmitry-ulitin-r3_yzk0TZls-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Our cats did this all by themselves. Our neighbors got a small yappy dog and they would let it go outside. Our cats figured out if they sat on the fence and stared at him, it would drive the dog completely insane.

They were completely safe because the dog couldn’t jump that high. They would sit there just watching him lose his temper.

The neighbor asked us to please tell our cats to stop torturing their dog, and we said, “Well, they’re cats…they’re not really gonna listen to us. How about you don’t leave your dog outside all the time?”

The guy was kind of a jerk anyway, so we didn’t have much motivation to stop them anyway. The dog seemed to be on the verge of losing its sanity, so eventually, they just stopped leaving the dog outside all the time.

zerbey

His Kids Don't Come Over Anymore


resizezachariah-smith-ZSHYFvNN8hg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My neighbor is a cop and his kids would always come over to my yard and throw rocks at my house, screech loudly, harass my chickens and leave their coop open, etc.

I put up a no trespassing sign and they still showed up. I put up some wire fencing and they still showed up. There was nothing I could actually do to get them in trouble because they felt they were “above the law,” given that their dad IS the law.

But luckily, last year I worked at a Halloween store, and so I put a rubber pig mask on the light post in my backyard. Needless to say, he doesn’t let his kids over here anymore.

d24602

No One to Blame But the Birds


resizececilia-par-YUg5RwlnMKc-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

We briefly had a neighbor who was a complete jerk. My personal pet peeve was when he would yell at our kids to “shut up” while they were playing in the backyard.

Next to his driveway was a big tree and I noticed he’d throw occasional hissy fits over the birds defecating on his car. One week, he was out of town but his car was still in the driveway.

Each day, I put a heaping pile of berries (blueberries, strawberries, etc.) next to the tree. He returned home to a car absolutely COVERED in technicolor bird poop.

RandoBoomer

I Finally Got to Sleep In


resizecarnaby-gilany-QqPFf7gIHCU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My neighbor used to insist on mowing his lawn at 5:30 am every Saturday morning. He had to drive on our property to access his back lawn and he would buzz right past my window with the mower deck down.

It would always wake me up. I asked him to stop but he brushed me off. One Friday night after working a late second shift, I left my dog’s chain in the tall grass on our property between our houses.

5:30 am Saturday came around and I woke up to the sound of the mower sucking the chain up into the mower deck. The next weekend, I got to sleep in.

mdw825

Nosey Neighbor


resizegene-pensiero-PlkN_pN2ryc-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My parents have an extremely nosey neighbor who would just stand at the fence and watch what we did. I mean, with her nose resting on the top of the fence.

This woman was in her 60s and she had kids and grandkids. I found out the other day that my dad was in the garden with a shovel. Turns out, he throws the slugs and snails in their trampoline and on their veggie plot for being annoying every time they aren’t there.

I couldn’t stop laughing at how petty and hilarious this was. Still makes my day.

23Tam56

A Taste of His Own Medicine


resizethe-blowup-N2XN_PBdnCg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My friend had a neighbor who put in a very bright yard light that was pointed at her bedroom window. She asked him to re-aim or dim the light, but he just gave her the cold shoulder.

Cue theatre stagehands. She put up a parabolic mirror pointed directly at the dude’s bedroom, then used an old projector dowser and an old lighting board to program a chase sequence that was put on repeat for hours on end.

The end result was a beam of randomly blinking light aimed at the neighbor’s bedroom window. When he complained, she let him know that it was his light source and all he had to do was turn off his yard light.

hippybiker

We Turned On the Speakers and Left


resizeshravan-k-acharya-qvfx5WZX-i0-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

We had neighbors (one girl above us, one girl below us) that were good friends with each other. The one above had two small dogs (we were only allowed one per apartment) and the one below had a bigger dog.

We all got along fine, but the girl above us was a bit of a jerk—she would leave her dogs alone for far too long and be very invasive of our lives.

She’d constantly beg to use our internet or drop by and make herself at home. I was sitting in the living room one day and I heard dragging in the hallway.

I went to check it out and saw both of the girls moving a mattress upstairs. They told me the girl below was moving in with the girl above us, making the living room her bedroom so she could sublet her apartment to save some money.

This was an old building, so there was not much in the way of soundproofing. That meant that we would have girl #1 still living there, who was loud enough, as well as girl #2 and the three dogs above us.

We decided to keep the peace and not say anything….until that first night. They decided to have their own dance party at 3 am, in HEELS, while screaming wildly.

We said “screw it” and called the landlord. The next morning, there was a pounding on my door. I went over and saw that it was the girl above us. She was flipping the heck out.

We apparently ruined their lives by revealing to the landlord that the girl who lived below us was subletting her apartment. That’s when the serious battles began.

It turned out she had been behind in rent, so the landlord was sick of her and gave her an eviction notice. That led to her going absolutely nuts. She would constantly stomp on her floor, run the hot water in the building for hours so it would run out on everyone else, encourage her dogs to bark, etc.

We changed our WiFi password, enraging her more. We wanted to take the high road, but soon enough, we needed to take action. We were going away for a couple of days and we knew our next-door neighbors quite well, so we mentioned our plan. They thought it was hilarious.

Right before we left, we turned on that annoying French nun song, “Dominique.” The upstairs girl may or may not have been named Monique. We hit the replay button, cranked it to full volume, and left for two days.

The landlord called us after about 24 hours. We feigned innocence and claimed that it was a simple oversight on our end (but really, he knew what was up).

We gave him permission to go into our place and turn off the music. Both the girls ended up leaving by the end of the month. They did not stop being jerks, but it was satisfying to know how much they suffered for at least 24 hours.

ismileicrazy

They Lost Their Privileges


resizeerik-mclean-cIOwoljvd_Q-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

After all of my siblings moved out for college, my parents changed the basement into a liveable unit and started renting it out. The first two tenants stayed for five years and they were great. We never had an issue with them.

The third group of tenants, however, gave us a lot of problems. They stopped paying rent after three months and since it was winter we couldn’t evict them.

My parents had to suffer through their parties while not receiving rent that was meant to go to 70% of the mortgage…They almost lost their house because of these jerks.

Well, my brothers and I were home for Christmas that year and after hearing about the issues, we decided to take care of it. Since it was my parents’ house and the tenants stopped paying rent, we decided to “move in” with them. These people were such jerks, I don’t even regret what we did.

We had the keys, so we would come in and out of the apartment as we wanted. A friend needed a place to sleep? No worries, we had a unit downstairs with two beds and two couches.

We’d let them stay for as long as they wanted. The bars were closing but we wanted to keep partying? No problem, we had a furnished apartment and we wouldn’t be bothering my parents.

I would go there to shower at 2 or 3 in the morning so I didn’t wake my parents up. My brother slept in one of the beds for five days. I invited 20 people once and we were all drinking until 5 am, up until one of the tenants left for work in the morning.

They did complain about privacy. We told them that according to the law, we were not allowed to throw them out at that moment; but since they stopped paying rent, they lost all privilege over the unit.

They called 9-1-1 the first night they found my brother sleeping there. We explained the situation to the authorities and said that they’d have to take us to court if they wanted us to stop using our apartment.

Some other things we’ve done: We brought our pets (the tenants were allergic, so I borrowed my friend’s cat), we used one of the bedrooms as storage for stuff we were supposed to get rid of, we opened all the windows in the middle of winter, and we disconnected the water heater.

We told them to take care of it themselves since they weren’t “tenants” but squatters. randomka111

Peace Offering


resizescott-eckersley-R-7_ErUOLxw-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I think I was the annoying neighbor. I used to live in a townhome complex where the back “porches” were just slabs of concrete and there was a field that connected all of them together.

One night, I had like six friends over and we were on the slab grilling some chicken wings. We weren’t too loud (we had no music playing and we weren’t trashed), but I imagine we were still audible to the other buildings.

A woman from across the way started hollering at us, threatening to call the authorities. A few of my friends were like, “Screw that lady,” but I decided to take a different route.

I plated up about eight wings with our scratch-made buffalo sauce and walked it over to the lady on a paper plate. I then apologized for disturbing her, handing over the plate as a sort of peace offering.

She told me she overreacted and was sorry for yelling at us. I told her it was okay, but I also asked her if she was doing alright because she’d probably had a terrible day; yelling at strangers for a little noise at 7 pm on a Friday like that.

She ended up confessing that she did have a bad day, and I told her I was sorry. Moving forward, we kept our volume at a reasonable level as a courtesy to her.

A little while later, she yelled back over that they were the best wings she’d ever had, and we gave a little cheer back to her. Never heard from her again. Hope her days are better now.

Wondershock

Early Birds Welcome


resizeartificial-photography-S_bbqW4yQZA-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I was 10 or so, an old lady yelled at my brother and me for sitting on “her” curb. She could have asked nicely, but she decided to be a jerk instead. 

So we came up with the most ingenious prank we’ve ever pulled. We decided to have an estate sale for her. We got up at like 4 am on a Saturday morning and put up homemade cardboard garage sale signs we made with her address on them.

In big, bold letters, we also wrote: “Early birds welcome.” We then sat on the curb a little down the street across from her house and watched people bang on the door for an hour or so.

The best part is we didn’t put a date on the signs, so if she didn’t find them all, people would just keep showing up every Saturday.

AlaskanBiologist

The Bees Outlasted My Neighbor


resizehiveboxx-65icrs88YYs-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Beehives. Putting them up is allowed where I live, and I have had them for over 10 years. They don’t bother anyone and most of my neighbors love them as they are good for their gardens and they get free honey.

However, one of my neighbors who moved in five years ago does have a problem with them, apparently. She has called the council and the authorities too many times to count, and they say all tell her the same thing:

They’re allowed, they’re not annoying anyone, and the bees were there first. So, she tried to take matters into her own hands whilst tipsy—she jumped the fence in the middle of the night with a can of fly spray.

It was very dark, so she accidentally jumped into my neighbor’s yard instead. Their very large guard dogs bailed her up and she pretty much destroyed their gardens, boat, shed, and car windows trying to get away from them.

When officers arrived at the scene, she admitted that she had tried to poison my bees but went into the wrong yard. She tried to sue me, saying: “If I wasn’t trying to poison her bees, none of this would have happened.”

The officers just laughed at her. They threw the book at her and now my neighbors are suing her for all the damage she caused.

She is now beyond broke. The bees are still there. When I hand out free honey around the neighborhood every few months, I always make sure she is around watching me and I intentionally don’t give her any.

Other neighbors tell me they regularly mention my bees around her just to see her lose her cool.

Tassiebarwench

No More Parties


resizejohn-cameron-CNdIE6rmQMU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

The rich brats next door were always throwing loud parties whenever my mom and dad went out of town for a few days, which was often.

One Sunday morning, I did a quick inspection of the property and found a bunch of litter had been left in the street or thrown into the grass. The worst part is that there was a public bus stop at the corner of our street, so we started getting complaints.

That night around midnight I gloved up, collected a bunch of them, then snuck into the neighbors’ yard and scattered them around the pool, the garage, and the back door where mom was sure to see them when she came home. There were no more parties. TGMcGonigle

Kids Keep Hitting the Mailbox


resizebrian-patrick-tagalog-axwRgfER-sA-unsplash-1.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My old boss had a problem with tipsy kids taking his mother’s mailbox. He got tired of replacing them, so he told me to go out there and make sure whatever hits it doesn’t keep going.

I bought a six-foot-long steel post with under three feet sticking out of the ground, then poured concrete around it and installed the mailbox.

The next tipsy kid that hit it never got a chance to take out the rest of the mailboxes on the street.

M33k_Monster_Minis

DIY Plumbing


resizesamuel-sianipar-scUBcasSvbE-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My grandpa’s neighbor’s septic tank started leaking into his backyard. He repeatedly asked him to fix the septic tank and clean up the mess in his yard, but he completely brushed him off.

So my grandpa took matters into his own hands. He rigged up a “plumbing” system in his yard and installed an upright PVC pipe that pointed at the neighbor’s backyard over the fence.

I don’t know how the system worked (I was only about eight years old, as this happened in the early 90s), but it was set up to spray the neighbor’s own septic waste over the fence and into the neighbor’s beautifully polished yard.

And just like that, the neighbor fixed his septic tank. They remained enemies until my grandpa died a couple of decades later.

I miss that old crazy man.

lonedandelion

Strange Power Issues


resizetroy-bridges-kXC6XhVL1e4-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My upstairs neighbor was noisy late at night. At like 2 am, he’d blast music and walk around with heavy feet. We had repeated conversations about it, but he blew us off. He bought us earplugs and told us to simply “deal with it.”

Unfortunately for him, the breaker box for the building was in our unit. After conducting a few tests with his friendly roommates who hated him just as much as we did, we zeroed in on the breaker to his room and an unoccupied area.

Guess who had strange power issues at night while he was being disruptive? He wasn’t the brightest bulb in the box and he never suspected us.

The landlord was aware of his disruptiveness and he was already on thin ice, so we asked him not to follow up on the guy’s complaints and he was on board.

After he got aggressive toward one of his roommates over an unrelated incident, he was kicked to the street at the end of his lease.

DarkyHelmety

Good Dog


resizeralu-gal-G8cB8hY3yvU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My neighbor had a super annoying son. His friends were constantly running over into our yard and breaking stuff. So, we got a dog named Molly.

Every time she had to poop, I’d put her on a leash and walk over to the property line so she could drop off some landmines for the kids. They were always on my property so the neighbors couldn’t complain about my dog pooping in their yard.

Finally, the bratty kid had his bratty friends over for a bratty birthday party and his parents sent them all outside to play. Of course, they were running over into our yard.

I ended up getting three or four of those little jerks with Molly’s landmines. After that, they never came into our yard again. Molly got belly rubs and a hamburger that night.

rhett342

Always Check the Property Line


resizedillon-kydd-2keCPb73aQY-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I was really young, our neighbor demanded we move our septic tank because he claimed it was partially on his property. He was a complete jerk about it and just kept hounding us to do it. My dad’s a really laid-back person, but eventually, even he got annoyed.

So one day, he had the property line surveyed. Turns out, not only was our septic tank on our own property, not his, but the corner of the guy’s house and part of his driveway was actually on our land as well.

My dad spent the next few months asking him when he was going to move his house off our land.

lovetolearn4ever

Over the Fence


resizezhivko-minkov-Al7AZBONaCo-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I was visiting my aunt a couple of years ago in Arizona. She lives outside of Phoenix. Her next-door neighbors had three or four kids who were super annoying.

There was a brick wall dividing their backyards, and such is common for the area. Upon my arrival, I found out that the kids next door were throwing things over the wall for fun.

Not just like harmless objects like twigs and pebbles, but like rocks, toys, garbage, and even knives. My aunt’s family had to keep their trampoline on the other side of the yard so it wouldn’t get stuff thrown into it.

I asked my aunt about it and she said she talked to their parents, but they still kept throwing stuff. So that night, I went online and filed a report with their address.

A couple of days later, the neighbors left a note at the front door with a long apology that basically said “it won’t happen again.” It pretty much stopped after that.

Pink-grey24

Out of Spite


resizeanton-mishin-_m-rXiCdUEI-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My dad was talking to our neighbor about what color he should paint the house and he said, as a joke: “Well, I might as well paint the old house blue.”

The neighbor became angry and responded, “You can’t do that! A blue house? How stupid and annoying! Don’t be dumb,” etc. And that’s how I grew up in a blue house.

Stokbakko

Never Tip an Outhouse


resizeamy-reed-y14YOjamViI-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My great-grandfather was one of the last people in town to get indoor plumbing, and as such, he had an outhouse in his backyard. Every year on Halloween, the neighborhood kids would come into his yard and knock over the building, exposing the cesspit. He got tired of it.

So one year, the night before Halloween, he moved the building forward and covered the fess with burlap, disguising it in leaves and grass clippings.

In the dark, it was almost impossible to tell it was there. On Halloween night, he sat in the outhouse and waited. It wasn’t long after sundown when he heard the wet splat outside as a couple of kids fell into the muck.

He lowered a ladder into the cesspit for them and said they could leave, but only if they promised to never mess with his outhouse again.

The kids honored their promise and even spread the word around the neighborhood not to mess with that outhouse anymore.

Lentra888

Nature Reclaimed the Fence


resizerandy-fath-07dDz_PI05k-unsplash-1.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My grandmother had a neighbor who refused to help her repair the fence between their properties. It was still fully functional as a boundary line, but it was falling apart.

Any conversation about fixing the fence ended with him saying that it was on her property, so it must be her responsibility to repair it. I guess that was fair.

She took a fall and was hospitalized for a few weeks. Upon her return, she found a new fence built an extra five feet into her property and a bill in the mail from the neighbor.

He argued with her for months that she owed him, saying that the original fence was actually on his property and that where it was now was the boundary line.  So my grandmother got a surveyor and…surprise!

The neighbor had taken five feet of her yard. At that point, she was already very old, frail, and tired of fighting her neighbor. But she had an ingenious way to get her revenge. She planted blackberries along the back fence and within two years, it was covered.

Every year, she’d walk the fence and throw seeds over it because, of course, it was still her yard. After five years of fighting, the blackberries had reclaimed her property. She’s been gone for a few years now but the blackberries remain, and it’s her way of haunting her neighbor.

He’s tried ripping up the ones on his side of the fence on numerous occasions, but the plants reseed themselves and grow back every year from her side.

almost_a_person

Just Talk to Your Neighbors


resizeaubrey-odom-uV-dSJ98q_U-unsplash-1.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My mom’s neighbor called the city on my mom to force her to repair the fence that divided their yards. This lady had always been a crabapple for 10-plus years, but this move really ticked my mom off.

The fence did need a few mild repairs, and my mom would have done them right away if the neighbor just talked to her about it (she was already in the process of getting quotes).

The city contacted my mom and told her that she needed to maintain her fence. My mom asked if she had to have a fence by law and the person she talked to could already sense where this was going. Turns out, there are rules about maintaining a fence, but she was not required to have one.

So my mom paid a contractor to tear it down entirely. The neighbor came to talk to my mom and asked when the new fence will be built. My mom replied, “If you want a fence, build it yourself!”

A couple of weeks later, my mom had a nice new fence, courtesy of her annoying neighbor. A little petty, perhaps, but hilarious nonetheless.

robothouserock

It Wasn't the Dog's Fault


resizetiago-vasconcelos-jBaHJVLbypg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

We lived in a neighborhood of townhouses. One neighbor let her dogs go #2 all over everyone’s lawn and she never picked it up. We tried asking her to be more considerate, but she didn’t listen.

We even tried picking the mess up for her and putting it on their doorstep, but she still refused to do it. So, my one neighbor decided to get a piece of it and smear it all over the front of the house. After that, she started picking it up.

CrabPplCrabPpl

They Didn't Know Who They Were Messing With


resizethe-creative-exchange-Y9CEWzhftAo-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I used to have a terrible work schedule. I’d have to wake up at 2:30 am every morning so I could be at work by 4 am. My downstairs neighbors would blare loud music at all hours of the night and I could feel the bass through my mattress.

I went downstairs and politely asked them to turn down the music, and they seemed to kindly agree. As soon as I got back into bed, they turned it up even louder and kept it going until about 1:30 am. 

They didn’t know who they were messing with. Before I left for work at 3:30 am, I turned over my amplifier so that the speaker was facing the floor.

I turned the volume up and set my guitar on top of it. I left for my 12-hour shift, and the feedback was still screaming when I came home. The neighbors never blasted their music again.

4bangeranger

They Stole Our Power


resizeclint-patterson-exfrR9KkzlE-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I was a teenager and lived with my parents, we had this one neighbor family that seemed sort of off.

One day, the father knocks on our door and tells my parents they haven’t had power for a long time and begged us to run an extension cord to one of our outside outlets for the day so his young kids could have cold milk with their cereal in the morning. My parents agreed to do this for one day.

The neighbor kept up his part and disconnected the cable after that day. A week later, they hooked it back up again without us noticing. A month goes by and our electricity bill is basically double what it normally is.

My parents head to the backyard and find the cable plugged in. So they yank it out and confront the neighbor.

At first, the neighbor will only open the door a crack. My stepdad realized the reason: he was concealing a weapon. That’s when we began to suspect that there was something really wrong with these people.

Stepdad demands an explanation as to why the cable was run to our outlet and the dude just sort of mumbles incoherently and shuts the door, locking it. The bad neighbor family was in a duplex and their neighbor comes around and asks what’s up.

My parents explain the whole story and how the next step was calling the police. The good neighbor is a former police chief and is friends with the entire force, so he offers to make the call.

Several cop cars arrive. The bad neighbor father and mother are arrested. Turns out they were up to some illegal shinanigans. The kids were put into foster care.

Naleid

Parking on Your Own Lawn


resizei-do-nothing-but-love-avvRANuWKkQ-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

The neighbor I used to have across the street from me once yelled at me for having a car parked partially on the grass (of my own lawn). The streets were narrow, and you’re technically not supposed to park in them.

The car was parked so that the tires on the passenger side of the car were both on the grass (by about a foot) but it was at least helping to not block the street. This was only temporary.

When she started yelling at me from her house, I thought it was because she didn’t like seeing the car in the street. I could have at least understood that. 

But no, she was furious (and I do mean furious) simply because the tires on my grass were going to ruin my lawn, and my ruined lawn was going to lower her property value.

She told me that parking on my grass was illegal, that her husband was an attorney and that she was going to be calling the police. I dared her to call, and I invited her husband to come talk to me. Neither happened.

manticor225

We Never Heard Them Make Noise Again


resizechristopher-ott-cf0p2IDquTE-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I was living with my brother and a new family moved in downstairs. It was a mother and two boys in their teens, and the mom had just been divorced. From what we could tell it was a bummer time.

So these two teenaged boys fought constantly. They were incredibly loud and I tried really hard to be empathetic and not complain. We would mention to their mom every now and then and she was very apologetic but it kept going. 

One Sunday they woke us up at 6 am, slamming doors and throwing stuff and just being ridiculous. My brother and I set up every piece of audio equipment we had in the house — a bass amp, two PA’s, and a full drum set.

And we blasted Hypnotize by Biggie for about 10 minutes and played along on bass and drums, PA’s on full. Never heard those kids make noise again. Not sure if we shocked them or they finally got it or what. But we did prove who could make more noise, I guess.

abeuscher

She Just Needed the Bus Stop Moved


resizemarcelo-cidrack-aTzXaSEazl4-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

She grew up in the neighborhood but moved out when she got married. About 10 years later, she buys her parents house when they decide to retire someplace else and moves back to the neighborhood.

She immediately has a problem with how everything isn’t the same as when she was a kid. My youngest son and her oldest son were the same age, but my son didn’t want to hang out with hers.

So she tells everyone in the neighborhood who will listen that my kids are bad and other kids should stay away from them.

The bus stop by our house has been in the same place since before we moved onto the street, but it’s not where it was when she was young so it has to be moved back! She had to walk an extra 30 feet to the stop and she couldn’t see her kid at the stop from her front windows.

She calls the school and the bus company for TWO years to get it moved. Lo and behold, the new school year starts and the stop has been moved back to where she wanted it.

Her kid rides that bus for about 12 DAYS and she puts him in a private Christian school and he no longer rides the bus.

ROOster7431

The Letter Must Have Worked


resizesebastian-huxley-RAFAi1JqScw-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

My wife and I were tearing down our shed to build a new one. After it was torn down, we had a pile of wood and siding waiting for a company to pick it up. After a week, I called them to remind them it still needed to be taken away. We started building the new shed, and a week later the pile was still there.

A couple of days later, I got a letter from the city stating the wood and tin needed to be gone within 30 days or I’d face a fine. My old lady neighbor came over the next day and said the pile was an eyesore and the city would take action. 

To be clear, this pile of wood and siding stood three feet tall and was nicely stacked on the side of our privacy fence; our side of the privacy fence between her and us. This is a fence we erected because she complained our kids were playing outside and she wanted quiet when she was hobbling around.

A couple of days later the company finally picked the stuff up. She again came over, then said, “That letter must have worked…” Some people just have nothing better to do with their time.

JamesTheMannequin

Everything's Up to Code


resizealex-simpson-3YTr9u-n9QI-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

She wants us to tear out our driveway because gravity and water rolls downhill. She’s a loon. When the driveway was put in 25 years ago, it was all done by contractors and up to code.

She’s threatened to sue us because her yard is at the bottom of he hill. We’re in Georgia and last year we had a BUNCH of rain. More than normal. So of course she had 3 inches of standing water.

She said she talked to a lawyer and her case was solid. And that she corroborated everything with our builder neighbor across the street. When intimidation didn’t work and hubby basically told her to get lost, we came home to a fence separating our properties.

Guess it was supposed to offend us? Anyway, that was the best fence ever! Guess what they say is true… great fences make great neighbors and we haven’t talked to her in a year.

IanandAbby

Eccentric But Harmless


resizesean-zhang-9Pm-zTG6zU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I moved in, Jerry seemed eccentric but harmless. Apparently, my landlord had a conversation with him and told him to leave me alone. This upset Jerry greatly.

He cornered me one day while I was unlocking my door and asked me to come sit with him in his apartment. I don’t think the place had ever been cleaned and he had hoarder tendencies.

He drank a bottle of wine in about 30 minutes, commenting on all the sad things in his life. Luckily he passed out, so I could leave.

One day while I was getting ready for work, he came into my apartment with another guy and tried to measure my walls for the “renovation” he was going to do to combine his and my apartments into one unit.

But, don’t worry, I could just live with him when it was all finished.

TracingBroads

Garbage Man's Little Helper


resizecarl-campbell-6K_oQcTCuNk-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Retired woman on my street follows the garbage truck and moves the garbage cans off the street while the rest of us are at work (because they are an eyesore).

This would be fine except she would leave them in the middle of the driveway and there is no stopping on our street during rush hour (bus route) so you either need to park a block away to move the garbage can then go get the car or risk getting a ticket while you move it.

Since the houses are quite close together we found out the first time by turning in and hitting the garbage can because it was just far enough back that you couldn’t see it until you turned.

GrumpyKitten1

I'm Someone's Bad Neighbor


resizesimon-shim-G3_ijrNF_cU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I’m probably someone’s bad experience, although they don’t know it’s me yet. The malfunctioning smoke alarm in my apartment complex hallway has almost become a sort of bitter joke among my neighbors–

It’s been chirping multiple times a day for the past two months, but no matter what, maintenance just can’t seem to make it stop.

What my neighbors don’t know is that the smoke alarm only chirped consistently for about three days. Everything since then has been my parrot, who liked the sound so much that she’s been mimicking it as often as she likes (read: 57+ times daily, this being about month 4).

They don’t know I have a parrot. The woman immediately next door does think I have a dog, though, because the feathery little brat also likes to bark and then scold herself for it.

criminyWindex

She Told Me it Was Illegal to Check the Mail


resizebrian-patrick-tagalog-axwRgfER-sA-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I was around 10 years old: my neighbor would occasionally watch me open my mail box to see if my GameStop magazine had arrived.

She would threaten me each time saying she was calling the cops and that it was illegal for me to check my parents mail. I actually believed this until I was 15 years old.

mugniftw

There's Someone On the Other Side of Those Walls


resizeyassine-khalfalli-e8nk93hHgfg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

Upstairs neighbor came home from the bar with his friend, both wasted. They were screwing around with a pistol and accidentally shot through their floor – down into my apartment. I got hit in the stomach.

Called 911 and when the ambulance was taking me away, my panicked fiancé was getting ready to leave because the EMTs told her to follow instead of riding with. My neighbor came down and was like “what happened? We heard a commotion!”

Cops were called and he got arrested.

narcolepsyinc

I Had Underestimated My Property


resizejacques-bopp-Jg2-zDy-oUg-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When I first moved in my house I didn’t know my exact property line yet, so I put wood by a tree I thought was mine. Neighbor came over saying it was his tree.

So I went ahead and got a survey to settle any troubles. He was pissed when I got 10 feet beyond the tree. Problems solved though!

icecreampopncereal

Handle With Care


resize20450-1550093734733.jpg.optimal.jpgFlickr / Alan Stanton / CC 2.0

We had this super gross family living next to us in a suburban townhouse. They had like six kids between them who were constantly screaming and screwing with our stuff.

The kids started going through our trash. One evening, I threw out a broken suitcase. I guess it had some slinky Halloween costume in it or something, because one of the kids came up to me as I was getting out of my vehicle and said: “We took your suitcase and my mom took your costume tehehehe!”

So I filled a box with cat poop, taped it up, wrote “handle with care” all over it, and put it in the trash. Then I watched from my window as the whole family took a box of cat poop into their house, opened it (presumably), and then brought it back out to the trash.

kmaexo

Perfectly Pleasant


resize20453-1550094272174.jpg.optimal.jpgFlickr / domandtrey / CC 2.0

Several years ago, I lived next door to this lovely family: a single mom with her two young kids (about six and eight) and her mother. Everything was perfectly pleasant until one day her brother came to live with them too.

This uncle would be a total jerk to his niece and nephew, and actually blew cigarette smoke in my kids’ faces when they were over there playing. My kids stopped going over after that.

But one day Uncle Fester comes over to our house and knocks on our door. He has a favor to ask. Apparently, his friend is about to get out of prison, and he’s going to come to stay with them for a little while until he gets back on his feet. 

So what does he need from me? Well, we lived on the corner lot of a cul-de-sac, so we’ve got a really large backyard. They don’t have any room to put him up in their house, so he wants us to let his fresh-out-of-prison buddy pitch a tent in our backyard and spend his nights there.

When I let him know that this was in no way okay with us, he responds, “You know, your yard is so big… He could probably do it anyway and you wouldn’t even know.”

I let him know that I would prosecute him for trespassing if I found that he had and that I’d be watching our backyard like a hawk now that he had made that threat.

HotKarl27

Death Trap


resizeblack-claw-hammer-on-brown-wooden-plank-209235.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

My neighbor that I share a backyard fence with decided to screw a bunch of grabber screws into said fence, about dog height. Not into anything, not to secure fence posts or slats, just random, pointy, knee-high screws resulting in doggy stitches. TWICE.

gingeslc

Shot Out of the Blue


resizecat-g9f6b883d8_1920.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

My neighbors and my family were absolutely fine for about 7 years. It’s a nice old man that was recently re-married. They have a 20 year old student that parties from time to time which is fine.

But then one day out of no where we find our 1 year old cat dead in their garden. Obviously we cannot be mad. The cat probably died of a heart attack or something. So my family shrugs it off as a coincidence.

Fast forward 2 months we have a new cat, younger, cuter. I come home one day and my cat come crawling to me giving the loudest meow of his life. Turns out my cat was shot. SHOT. WITH A BULLET.

Our gardener told us that he clearly saw the neighbor with a gun (shooting pigeons or something) minutes before my cat was shot. So yeah, as you can imagine we haven’t been close to our neighbors since that day.

P.S our cat survived with surgery, perfectly fine, but only has 8 lives left. JoBusser

Spare Change


resizemoney-2180330-1024x683-1.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

I once had a neighbour in college that would knock on my door and ask for money. I would just say I’m a broke student and I can’t spare anything. It was weird as anything and a weekly occurrence at the least. She was in her 50s and working.

One day I got fed up when she knocked on my door (I think I was stressed for exams) and I said yeah I got some money for you. I asked her to hold out her hands and gave her maybe 2 dollars worth of nickels that I had in a change jar. She never bothered me again.

ItsOfficiallyME

Enough to Make You Want to Move


resizedog-1209066-1024x819-1.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

Moved into a brand new house. Noticed an old toilet, garbage and a broken down hot tub in the neighbors front yard. Ok. Made cookies for all the neighbors and went over to introduce ourselves. He laughed and slammed the door in our faces. Ok.

Out landscaping our new yard with my husband and laying some bricks. Husband is on his knees making sure they are level while I stand and hand him the bricks. Neighbor walks by and yells “Well, I can see who wears the pants!” Husband and I look at each-other perplexed. Okaaayyy.

Get a puppy. Our other neighbor lets us know she witnessed the neighbor’s grown son throwing lit cigarettes over the fence at our puppy when he was in the backyard. We found about 50 cigarette butts in our yard. We do not smoke.

Then she also had to call the police because his other son broke the lights on her garage and defecated on her Welcome mat (all captured by her Home video system).

About 6 months later get a complaint for dog barking with a $500 fine. It was ridiculous. Our dog never barked, unless someone walked by or came to the door.

We had letters from all 16 surrounding neighbors attesting that our dog never barked, what great neighbors we were and how crazy the complainant was.

The letters were not admissible. Since there were 2 pathological adult sons and the neighbor’s word against ours-2 sane, working adults, we lost and had to pay. We sold the house and moved shortly afterward.

ToeSchmoe

Can We Use the Pool?


resizepool-2662127-1024x683-1.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

They insisted that we pay to have a gate installed between our backyard fences so that they may use our above-ground pool as they please, preferably when they invite friends over.

When we denied, they threw a hissy fit and found an excuse to “punish” us. You see, the pool was going through some (expensive) issues with leakage into the yard.

They threatened to call the fine-happy HOA because the water was (barely) leaking into their yard they rarely used and their dog was getting sick drinking the water. (It wasn’t)

Not wanting to deal with that crap and also wanting to clean our own backyard of the pond that began housing frogs, my father spent his birthday day off from work in the Texas heat digging a trench and installing a pipe so that the water could drain.

The neighbors came outside and harassed dad the entire time he was digging the trench, telling him it would’ve just been easier to install the gate.

Would’ve been easier to install a shovel into your frontal lobe, freeloaders.

Vinyl-Bread

She Doesn't Have a Green Thumb


resizesprinkler-3569233-1024x683-1.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

My neighbor sprayed our hedge between our houses with something that killed it, which we planted there next to her cyclone fence so we wouldn’t have to look at her. Everything we’ve planted there dies, and they always start dying from her side.

She’s super nosy and is always watching out the window which is why we plant things there! She also moved her in-ground sprinklers onto what I think is our property, touching our driveway, and sets them to go off in the middle of the night when our cars are parked there.

She refuses to set them to go off while we’re at work because it “interrupts her yard work time.” The water spots on our cars are irrigation water, and leave huge white amoeba shaped marks down one side of our car! I paid someone $250 last year to use acid to remove them and they were still faintly there.

She actually had the nerve to suggest our son park his car there because the color of his car won’t show the water spots as bad!

Her husband walks up and down the backyard fence and whistles at our dog to make her bark, then the wife complains to us about our dog barking. (Our dogs are inside dogs, never outside for more than a few minutes at a time. They’re not out there all day barking).

When we have a family member house sit, the neighbor complains about the number of cars in our driveway and parked in front of OUR house. Says she doesn’t like looking at a “used car lot.” She’s a real peach.

41andfun

Ding-Dong Ditch


resizedoor-2616077-1024x650-1.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

We had a neighbor of ours—a retired police officer in his 50’s—doorbell ditch us for around a month. The crazy thing is we never knew it was him. Apparently he was mad at us because we had a dog that would bark and disturb.

He never told us about this, so I don’t feel too bad. He also keyed the car to one of my houseguests at the time.

Finally, one day before we were moving out, he doorbell ditched us and we caught him. My wife and I looked at each other dead in the eye and without a word I sprinted out the front door and she took off out the back.

We had this unspoken thing where we were like, “Let’s trap this loser!” I’m more impressed than we did this and were so tight that we didn’t need to say anything to one another.

I caught up with our shirtless neighbor and he put his hands up and said, “Okay, you got me.” I said, “Dude, what the heck? Why are you doing this?” He was then proceeded to tell me about my barking dog. He apologized and said he should’ve told us about it.

Anastik

Don't Wake the Baby


resizegrimace-1012862-1024x683-1.jpg.optimal.jpgPixabay

Okay so, I live in Brooklyn, NY. I recently got my own apartment in Greenpoint.

I have a pretty great job in midtown Manhattan that offer a lot of overtime, so I have crazy hours and I commute to work. So, when I leave work late usually around 11:45PM every night, I catch the late trains and it takes me anywhere from 45 minutes to an hour to get home.

Anyways, when I get home around 12:30AM, I’m exhausted and I just kick my shoes off and just throw them and my duffle bag wherever they land (usually on the floor right by my apartment entrance.)

So when I first moved into my apartment, I always heard banging from the neighbor downstairs. I never thought anything of it, I was always like “Is this person serious? They’re working on their apartment at 1:00 in the morning?!”

It wasn’t til maybe 3 weeks ago that I realized that he/she was getting upset about the banging that I was doing over their heads. I guess our apartments are set up differently and their bedroom is directly under my living room?

I’ve become more conscious of the noise I make when getting home and started gracefully taking my shoes off and placing my belongings on the couch.

Regardless, the person who lives down there has never actually came up to my apartment to address the issue,

But I find it hilarious because I just picture them laying in bed cuddled up with a broom stick or something similar and just waiting for the slightest pin drop to jump on top of their bed and start stabbing their ceiling.

[deleted]

The Tell-Tale Floor


resizeboard-bricks-brickwork-concrete-269063.jpg.optimal.jpgPexels

Lived above a guy in a really old fourplex and I guess the wood floors squeaked really loudly when I walked around. It’s not like I was stomping around either but the dude would constantly come upstairs and bang on my door and yell at me to stop moving around.

I felt badly for him in the beginning because he seemed genuinely frustrated but he didn’t seem to understand or believe that I wasn’t slamming my feet on my floor/his ceiling.

I called my landlord several times asking him if he had a solution. I couldn’t move because I was locked in to my lease but my landlord was just like, “buy a lot of rugs.”

It got to the point that I couldn’t take the constant yelling and I was literally either tip toeing around or hopping from my couch to my chair in order to get out of my living room so that he wouldn’t be standing at my door yelling at me.

Finally I went downstairs one day and asked if we could talk about the situation because I felt like maybe if I looked him in the eye when he was calm and explained that I wasn’t doing it on purpose and that there was literally nothing more I could do (I had already bought areas rugs!) he would maybe understand.

So I went downstairs and very nicely explained and he seemed to be listening. And then he said “I’m about at the point that if it happens again I’m going to show up at your door with a really big knife.” And then he just stared at me.

I basically ran out of there, called my landlord and said that I was more or less being threatened and a month later the guy moved out. And then as soon as I could I did too. Super crappy situation.

ElleTheFox

Winning Numbers


resizedylan-nolte-RSsqjpezn6o-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

I had a neighbor who won the lottery (about $800k USD after taxes) and he decided that made him God. He also had an addiction problem and would stay up late partying and playing music at all hours of the day and night.

I live in a small mountain town and the sound echoes terribly. Well, this guy “Dear John’d” his husband of 8 years and at one point was making violent threats against him.

The authorities got involved and the neighbor got slapped with domestic charges. But that’s just the beginning: AFTER the charges were filed, this neighbor decided he would buy a firearm, which was totally not allowed.

He had to lie about the pending charges to get it, and then he told his ex that once he got it, he was going to end him. After that, he decided that partying out in Portland was more important than attending his court date, and he subsequently had a bench warrant issued to him.

On the Friday of a St. Patty’s weekend, he was blasting his music again, so I called 9-1-1 to register a noise complaint. He likely had a scanner, because every single time, before they came, he turned down the music.

They’d arrive not hearing any music, then let me know there was not much they could do. At that point, I let it slip that he had an active warrant. They ended up taking him in.

Because he blew all of his lottery money and alienated himself from every friend he used to have, he spent the whole long weekend behind bars with every other jerk who was there. About three weeks later, he put his house up for sale. A crowning achievement for me.

HBICharles

His Own Dog Destroyed His Lawn


resize1920px-Bru%CC%88hwu%CC%88rfel-1.jpg.optimal.jpgWikimedia Commons / Rainer Zenz / CC 1.0

In our first house, my wife and I had a neighbor who disliked us from the start. Apparently, the people who lived in the property before we did were his family friends—they went through a divorce and ended up selling the house to us.

He was petty and mean to my wife, who doesn’t like confrontation, and he’d do annoying things to mess with her. He’d park across our driveway before she left for work, throw pieces of wood over the fence, let his dog go all over our lawn and not pick any of it up, etc.

I tried talking to him a couple of times, but he promptly told me to screw off. That was the last straw—I had to fight back. 

I knew he loved his lawn because he’d always brag about how it looked to everyone, so the next time it rained, I went out back and threw an entire box of oxo cubes into their backyard and let the rain melt them into the grass.

His dog absolutely destroyed his yard looking for the smell and I would make sure to comment on it every chance I got. We moved shortly after.

Caffinejunkie9

Plenty of Evidence


resizegavin-allanwood-GetNArT8QEU-unsplash.jpg.optimal.jpgUnsplash

When my boyfriend was 14, he was living with his mom and sister on a housing estate. It was summer and he liked a bit of light in his upstairs bedroom, so he left the curtains open at all times.

That included when he was getting dressed and after having a shower, so if you purposefully stared at his window, you could see him from his waist up (and only his waist up).

Well, their neighbor did not like that one bit. She went pounding on their door, yelling at my mother-in-law that her son was a disgrace, hanging around always naked and exposing himself to her daughter.

My mother-in-law told her he had every right to do whatever he wanted in his bedroom, and that if they didn’t want to see him all they needed to do was not to look.

A couple of days went by and lo and behold, the authorities showed up at the neighbor’s door. Turned out the neighbor had been filming and taking pictures of my boyfriend to show to the housing people as evidence of his wrongdoing to get them kicked out.

Except that the housing office called the authorities on her for taking pictures and videos of an underage kid and kicked her and her family out.

_darksoul89

The Ultimate Revenge

My dad's neighbor was a piece of work. He destroyed my dad's septic tank while building his driveway, After a confrontation, he said "Your old man wears a Diaper anyways" My dad was pretty pissed at him but didn't say a word until the next morning when we heard screaming from his driveway yelling "OMG! What in the World.." My dad passed me a smile and it took me a second to realize that my dad had put a smelly diaper in his mailbox.

Deleted User