Waiting Is Part of the Joke
Loading screens are the last place you’d expect to see something funny. More often than not, they’re usually just throwaway spots where a game sneaks in a helpful reminder or a bit of lore. But that’s not always the case. Some developers treat that downtime like a tiny stage, filling it with fake advice, sarcastic encouragement, or tips that feel personally offended by your awful performance. Come with us as we read the funny fine print from 20 games.
1. Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon
Alright, this one might be the king of aggressively unhelpful loading screen tips—though, you might not think it to look at it! One tip tells you that if you’re taking too much damage, you should simply stop getting shot. Another reminds you that handguns are weapons that fit in your hand. Thanks, boys.
Glenn Carstens-Peters on Unsplash
2. DOOM Eternal
Who knew that a classic game still knew how to keep the party going? The main strategy is usually to move fast and pop demons, so it’s hilarious that DOOM thinks we need advice…if you can even call it that. For example, did you know that to clip a Tyrant, you should shoot at it until it dies? Well, now you do.
Pelle Wessman from Malmö, Sweden on Wikimedia
3. Borderlands 3
Borderlands 3 is packed with loud characters and louder weaponry, but it also comes with loading screen tips that care more about nonsense than survival. One of its best random examples insists that four “chugga” sounds are the correct number before “choo-choo,” which, the more we think about it, is actually correct.
Tim Bartel from Cologne, Germany on Wikimedia
4. Spec Ops: The Line
Spec Ops: The Line isn’t a comedy by any means, but some of its later loading screen messages land with some pretty dark humor. Early tips explain basic mechanics, but as the campaign gets uglier, the game starts asking things like whether you feel like a hero. It’s not so much ha-ha funny as it is uncomfortable sarcasm.
5. Duck Detective: The Secret Salami
Ridiculous name aside, Duck Detective: The Secret Salami uses its loading screens to deliver “duck facts” that sound educational but are (probably) nonsense. One claims that ducks were the first species to abolish the monarchy. Another simply points out that there are over 1000 ducks. The more you know, right?
6. Terraria
If you’ve ever spent any time in Terraria’s massive world, you know that it’s actually funnier than it lets on! In case you never bothered to read them, the loading text actually gets strangely specific. Even ordinary lines about hiding treasure or finding valid housing get funny once you remember the game’s controlling an entire playground while chattering like a landlord.
Harry Wood from London, UK on Wikimedia
7. Minecraft
Minecraft’s loading and splash text have always had a habit of poking players. Bedrock’s loading tips can be useful, but lines like “Ocelots show creepers who’s boss” carry the same oddball charm as the game’s famous title screen jokes. It’s gentle humor, but it’s humor nonetheless.
Oberon Copeland @veryinformed.com on Unsplash
8. The Sims
The Sims made fake loading processes feel like an art form, didn’t it? Some phrases were in Simlish. Others straight-up called you out for complaining about freebies: "I don't want free earbuds." Whatever the case, your Sim can never just burn grilled cheese in peace.
Kristin Wassermann on Wikimedia
9. Cannon Fodder
Cannon Fodder turned long waits into a running gag by flashing messages that sounded less like progress updates and more like a bored machine. The Amiga version included lines about making tea or coffee, wanting sugar, and even a banana-related disk drive error. It’s a good reminder that old loading screens had plenty of time to develop a personality.
10. Divekick
Divekick is already a joke about fighting games taken to the extreme, so its loading tips only lean into the nonsense. Instead of offering any wisdom, it just throws out references and odd comments. One jokes that if someone online is screaming and swearing at you, they’re really just trying to say “good game.” It’s a parody with attitude, and we love it.
Nikita Kachanovsky on Unsplash
11. Cards, Universe and Everything
Cards, Universe and Everything uses loading messages very wisely, so long as you take the time to read them. Lines like “Inflating Universe” and “Worshipping Gods” turn a normal wait into a tiny fake creation myth. But then again, what were we expecting?
12. The Stanley Parable
Oh, wow, who saw this one coming? You did, of course! We all did! The Stanley Parable built its whole identity around messing with structure and expectation. Its famous “The End Is Never...” loading phrase just keeps looping, while some of them actually do hide legitimate codes. Honestly, it doesn’t matter what you do—the game will find a way to mock you.
13. Cuphead
If you can survive long enough to actually see a loading message, Cuphead’s best failure messages only add to your stress. Every boss defeat comes with a death card that shows how close you got and adds a little rhyming insult for good measure. Remember, crying is a free action.
14. Portal 2
There’s something so hilarious and unnerving about Portal 2’s comedy, especially as the game creeps forward. One of the best examples is the Aperture-style warning telling you to look directly at an implosion. Another is simply a capitalized “beep.” Ah, what can we say? We’re sticklers for terrible advice.
Dave Monk from Seattle, USA on Wikimedia
15. Cyberpunk 2077
Despite all the bugs, Cyberpunk 2077’s loading text cleverly mixes worldbuilding with little bursts of personality. Some tips are practical, while others lean into Night City’s bleak humor by describing danger with casual bluntness. It’s not always laugh-out-loud, but it’s enough to make you exhale through your nose.
16. Goat Simulator
Goat Simulator is…insane. It’s a cult classic. Most importantly, it doesn’t need complicated jokes to somehow make us giggle even more. Even its control reminders, like telling you how to lick objects or ragdoll your goat, are just part of its charm.
17. Undertale
Undertale doesn’t rely on normal loading screen advice, but then again, it doesn’t have to. Its post-death and retry moments speak directly to the player. The game’s save and continue language can shift depending on what you’ve done, too, which makes even a simple restart judgmental. Think of it more as nervous laughter.
Toby Fox and/or Temmie Chang on Wikimedia
18. The Bard’s Tale
The Bard’s Tale has the attitude of a fantasy game that has played too many fantasy games—and it wants you to know it. Everything from its humorous writing, quest mockery, and snarky presentation makes mere pauses feel like the game is rolling its eyes at traditions.
19. Deadpool
What do you know? The Merc with a Mouth will indeed mouth off! Its humor constantly breaks the fourth wall, so any tip feels like Deadpool can see right through your screen…reminding you to keep your health above zero or forgetting what the B button does. And let’s not forget, “Don't forget to reload! Your bullets do way more damage when they actually hit the enemies."
20. South Park: The Stick of Truth
South Park: The Stick of Truth uses RPG systems sincerely enough to work, but its presentation is always ready to undercut anything too serious. It’s a perfect match for South Park’s tone, where even basic guidance feels like it’s seconds away from becoming an insult (which it probably is).
